The Sociopaths Among Us.

Sometimes I wonder why I'm drawn to certain books. If there is any validity in the idea of how we decorate our place; or the pets we choose; and how we dress, then the books we are drawn to say a lot about us too. The subject of psychology, especially abnormal psychology, has always intrigued me.

I started to read about psychology at first to understand myself. I was really messed up when my husband deserted me. and blamed myself; I wanted to find out what was wrong with me.

This was '62, the year our second son was born. For some reason Freud caught my attention while I was at the library; having always been an avid reader, and learning much from books. His theories were surprising, and caused much painful soulsearching, but I got tired of his preoccupation with sex; something was missing from the picture he painted. It wasn't long after that when the Manson family made the news. I bought the book, 'Helter-Skelter'; written by the man who invesigated the case; if memory serves me well. I grew up with the stories of Jack the Ripper, and Sweenie Todd; I thought this book may shed some light on what makes people seriel killers. But it didn't satisfactorally answer the question of how someone could manipulate others to do their bidding.

What made people tick made me curious. I think my study of Astrology was originally for the purpose of understanding myself, and others. Considering how important relationships are to human beings; as essential as breathing, learning how to relate and deal with other people was something to be desired.

I was really pleased that Psych 101 was a required subject in the course I chose to take as a mature student, in '85. In the second year Consumer Psychology was an option, which I jumped on. I even borrowed another course textbook from one of my professors, to get more understanding of how the brain worked. At the time I was interested in studying how it might relate to my studies of Astrology; I knew Jung used it in his practice. What I wanted to know was which planets influenced the different parts of the brain; that hadn't been done yet.

This is an ongoing process, even to psychologists who do the studies, and write the books. At the moment I'm learning that Sociopathy cannot come up with answers to several disturbing questions. It seems that sociapaths are invisible, except if caught doing a crime, and many are too smart; or not criminally inclined. They are like fingerprints, individual; nothing outwardly gives them away. Like everyone else, they generally dress, and live a lifestyle that everyone sees as respectable; like the mask we all wear when we create a persona from which we can deal with other people. The scary thing is that 1 in 25 people are sociopaths, which means they have no conscience and can do whatever they want without any guilt feelings; it makes you think twice about the seemingly cold, heartless people you know.

What I like about this book, 'the socipath next door' by martha stout, ph.d. is that it is written to help us recognize them, so we can avoid becoming victims. The disturbing thing is that as I read the case stories it reminds me of people I know, some related by blood, which explains some of the behaviour that has often puzzled me. I'm only halfway through the book, and I'm really hoping she comes up with some effective ways of dealing with these 'loved ones.' So I'm eager to finish reading this book; so much so that it's actually distracting.

For now it is believed that there is no cure. Another disturbing thought is noticing some of my own anti-social behavior along the way; what's the old saying, "It takes one, to know one!" It certainly takes personal experience to empathize with others. Still I wonder if I were one of those born with a predisposition, who became relatively normal because of positive early bonding with loving caregivers. And so the quest for understanding continues.